where are the good days

-

 on a good day 

i could never stop smiling 

i’d say sorry a billion times 

say funny things to make you laugh 


on a good day

the sun shines so bright 

the sky is perfect 

the sunrise, the sunset, the smell of rain


on a good day 

i’m skipping about  

empowering and productive 

it looks like i’m doing great 


but the good days are gone 

or so it feels 

there are no rainbows 

or clear skies 


it’s always grey or dark or gloomy 

the sun is hidden

i stop appreciating 

the sunrise, the sunset, the smell of rain


the good days are gone 

or so it feels 

i can no longer smile as i used to 

breathing is harder than usual 


it’s rage, at times  

and i don’t know how to handle it 

i can only sit by myself 

i can only choke back tears


the good days are gone 

or so it feels 

i no longer feel driven 

it still looks like i’m doing great 


the good days are gone 

and i fear they may never return 

it’s scary and i’m terrified all the time 

breathing is the hardest 

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